A time for everything

I haven’t felt much like writing this week. I have actually been feeling pretty down. The thing is, I’m pretty good at keeping my feelings inside. I think it comes from years of practice with hiding how bad I was feeling all of the time dealing with Crohn’s disease.

However, when it comes to writing, I have tried my best to be honest with myself and with everyone who comes across my blog. The Stolen Colon is the place that I wear my heart on my sleeve and do not care what anyone says. So obviously, that makes it difficult for me to keep those feelings buried.

I haven’t wanted to write because I knew that it would bring all of those feelings to the surface. I knew it would make me feel sad and disappointed… and a little like a failure. I knew it would make me think again about where I’m going with my life and why I can’t seem to get to where I want to be.Β And that’s how I feel in this moment. And I realize how tired I am of feeling like this.

But tomorrow, things are changing. I’m getting the chance to accomplish something that I’ve been wanting to do for a long time: going back to school. My orientation is first thing in the morning and I will get to meet the other students and professors. I feel like I’m getting the chance to take control of my life and move it in the direction that I want to go. There has been a lot that hasn’t gone the way I had hoped, so it’s nice to be starting something that I really want to do.

I do apologize in advance for the overload of grad school posts this week, but I have a feeling that between orientation, my first class and a department cookout, there will be a few of them.

So I want to take the opportunity to move past the disappointment and instead look forward to the next phase in my life. There’s a time for everything in this life, but now isn’t the time to be sad.

ecclesiastes There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace stolen colon stephanie hughes crohn's colitis ostomy blog

7 thoughts on “A time for everything

  1. Stephen Dempster

    Yay πŸ™‚ I’m glad to hear that you are getting back to school and will keep sending happy/healing thoughts your way. The fact that you you take control of your life in spite of (or perhaps because of) having Crohn’s Disease makes you even more special than you can realise. It makes others with Crohn’s/IBD realise that despite the “bad”, good things can still be achieved. Never underestimate the solace, inspiration, motivation and hope you give others through your writing πŸ™‚

    Reply
  2. Tony J Leone

    good morning Stephanie. I am glad your writing and going to school and are a tri athlete. you have been an inspiration to me from the time I found your blog. please keep it up and keep us all inspired. I will be praying for you daily, because it is true, there is a time for everything.

    Reply
    1. Stephanie Hughes Post author

      Tony, that really means a whole lot to me. It’s easy to want to curl up in a ball when things get rough, but it’s really nice to know that there are others out there rooting for you/relating to you. And I REALLY appreciate the prayers!

      Reply
    1. Joe Dews

      Hi Stephanie. Don’t hold back. I have been reading your blog for sometime. Ever since my go around with surgery. I never comment. Maybe I should have. I really do enjoy reading your stuff. You could blog about your local gas prices. I’d still read it. I wish I had your courage to speak publicly about my feelings. Guess its a guy thing. Sometimes I laugh. Sometimes I compare whatever you are going through to what I am. If not for people like you and some of the others I’d been in a worse way. Thank you for your blog. Joe

      Reply
      1. Stephanie Hughes Post author

        Joe, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that. It is hard sometimes to know if you’re moving in the right direction, so I’m so thankful for people like you to be a reminder of why I wanted to do this in the first place. Thank you.

        Reply

Sit down, stay a while. I'd love to hear from you.