Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t just jump into things without thinking. I’m very methodical and like to have things planned out. I don’t take major decisions lightly.
I have several people make comments about me rushing into this surgery and telling me to take some more time before making this decision. Things have moved quickly in the past couple of weeks since my most recent hospitalization. But that doesn’t mean that Jarrod and I haven’t been taking this very seriously and looked at all of our possible options.
I have long had an anything-but-surgery mindset. But it was about a year ago that I first went to see a surgeon and talked about my possible options. At the time, I pretty much just went to appease my doctor and told the surgeon I wasn’t interested in surgery. Then in February of this year, I had my most recent colonoscopy and it was at that point that my doctor told me that surgery looked like my only option. I still wasn’t ready to accept this at that point, but went to see the surgeon again.
Things came to a head during my hospitalization earlier this month when I think it really hit me that I could no longer go on as I have been for many years. I’ve sort of just kept pace for years now, making due with what I have. But when it comes down to it, when I was asked when was the last time I felt really good, I didn’t have an answer. And now I’ve had a number of dangerous infections and painful joint inflammation pop up that have made me realize it’s time for a change.
So yes, things have changed quickly. Last month I would have said “absolutely not” to surgery. Now, just weeks later, I have a date already set. But this has been more than a year in the making. (Honestly, I guess it has been 13-years in the making.) It’s just taken me that long to come to terms with it. And now, I’m feeling good about my decision. Actually, I sometimes wish it was sooner than next week. I appreciate the concern and want to assure everyone that I have thought this through and am convinced that I am making the right decision.