Running on fumes

That is how I have felt for the past couple of weeks. I’ve felt tired, worn down… Honestly, I think I’ve felt this way since my surgery more than 2 months ago. I don’t really feel like I’ve ever gotten back on top of things since then.

I’m not quite sure what I’m missing. I guess I realize that my body is still healing itself and that takes energy. My wound is definitely getting better each day, but it is still a slow process. Thankfully, I have figured out a better way to use the silver nitrate sticks so as to not interrupt my sleep any more, so hopefully that will help, too.

I think work is also pulling me down. I never “eased back into it” like I had originally planned. I went back just 3 weeks post-op and hit the ground running with a 50 hour work week as soon as I started back. And it hasn’t gotten any better since then. Right now, I’m on day 9 of working 11 out of 12 days. I’m exhausted.

activities runkeeper running run training exercise run keeper stephanie hughes stolen colon crohns colitis ostomy ileostomy blogRunning and training has taken the biggest hit. I’m having a hard time finding the time and energy to get back into it. I usually always went to the gym or ran first thing in the morning, but that means waking up sometime between 5:00 and 5:30, and I just haven’t been able to do that recently. My other options are right after I get off from work, when it’s the hottest part of the day in the South, and it just takes too long to do the whole gym thing. Or I can do it after dinner, but that’s the time that I’ve been using to study and to prepare for going back to grad school in just about 2 weeks (Yikes!). So I’m feeling very stuck. And I’m not sure what should be the most important thing to me right now… getting the rest I need or being disciplined with training and exercising.

Right now, I think just surviving this week is the first step. I’ve been so busy with work and other things recently that I don’t feel like I’ve had a chance to catch my breath. I really need some time to get back ahead of things, instead of feeling like I’m constantly a step behind. My house is a wreck; I’ve hardly made a home cooked meal; I still have a lot of reading before starting class. I’m hoping that this coming weekend I will have a chance to regroup and figure this stuff out… And maybe take a morning to sleep in.

4 thoughts on “Running on fumes

  1. Diana Bourassa

    Hey Stephanie, although I do not have an ostomy, I believe as with our diseases, vitamin absorption is an issue with our diseases. You probably still need more time to heal and take a look at what your body needs, vitamin B12, iron with Vitamin C to help the iron absorb. Check to see if you are anemic. Does your diet have to change with an ostomy? high fibre vs low fibre. Give yourself time, listen to your body is the best advice I can give.

    1. Stephanie Hughes Post author

      Thank you, Diana. That’s great advice and I know that I am not great about taking all of the vitamins I need. With an ostomy, my diet didn’t change per se, but I do have to watch my fiber intake.

  2. Crystal

    Hi Stephanie, I agree with Diana…with our disease it takes a lot out of your without surgical complications. I seem to remember with my last surgery I really did ease back into my life and I wasn’t (my) 100% for close to 6 months. It’s never easy waiting for our bodies to heal when we just want to get back to normal and life. Rest, rest, rest…that’s what has worked for me. It did take me 16 years and 8 surgeries to figure that out. 😉 Wishing you all the best in your recovery!

    1. Stephanie Hughes Post author

      Crystal, that’s a needed reminder but a hard one to accept. This has been such a different recovery from my last surgery and it has not been easy coming to terms with the fact that I’m not 100%… especially when other people are expecting me to be. I’m trying to be patient but I’m definitely not the best at that.
      Yes, rest. I should probably try that. Thank you.


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