Tag Archives: children

There’s a new girl in town

Everything anyone ever told me about having two kids is true. The past few weeks since the birth of my daughter have been exhausting. They’ve been amazing, but exhausting, too. I have been wanting to share the news for a while, but had a difficult time finding the time (or energy) to sit down and actually do it. So I am woefully behind on this, but here goes…

chandler birth labor delivery mom baby ostomy blockage obstruction pregnancy ibd crohn's disease ileostomy stolen colon stephanie hughesOn July 11, we welcomed a wonderful new addition to our family: Chandler Marie. She was born at 38 weeks and 5 days gestation, nearly a full three weeks further along than my son. Her birth was the result of my body naturally going into labor, and not due to an induction because of a persistent bowel blockage, as I dealt with last time. (You can read the entire story of my first delivery here.)

The abbreviated version of this story is that I started having mild contractions the evening before around 10:00 p.m. I went to sleep and they woke me up a few hours later and we ventured over to the hospital around 3:00 a.m. to find that I was already 5 cm dilated. After 8 hours of labor, I was no further dilated, but then BAM, in the next hour and a half I went from 5 to 10 cm dilated. I started pushing at 1:01 p.m. and she officially entered the world at 1:07 p.m. (Trust me, it was not the same story with my first.) She weighed 7 lbs. 9 oz. at birth.

There were no complications with my ostomy during the actual labor and delivery process. It was essentially a non-factor during that time. And thankfully, as was the case with my first, my body seemed to get back to normal as soon as she was born. I was able to start eating the same foods I had prior to pregnancy with no blockage issues! It’s taken a few weeks, but my stoma is getting back to normal. It was still fairly large for the first couple of weeks and I was concerned that it might not return to its normal size, but at 9 weeks postpartum it seems to be pretty close to the size it was originally and not prolapsed like it had been during my pregnancy.

chandler birth labor delivery mom baby ostomy blockage obstruction pregnancy ibd crohn's disease ileostomy stolen colon stephanie hughesChandler has been doing great, as well. We were able to come home just 24 hours after her birth. She’s been growing like a champ and getting more personality by the day.

I’ll be sure to share a little more about the final weeks of my pregnancy with an ostomy and attempting to avoid another blockage but know I am so thankful that I was able to avoid any further complications with my ostomy and any more hospitalizations. I wanted so much to be able to deliver as a result of spontaneous labor and I was able to achieve that goal, but it definitely wasn’t easy.

These past few weeks have been a big adjustment as I’m now living with a high-energy 2-year-old and an infant. I hope as we get more settled that I can get back into a good routine of sharing information and keeping in contact with all of you. I apologize to anyone that I have not responded to recently and I hope to be in touch soon. Thank you for all of your support and well wishes!

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Thoughts on motherhood & ostomies

Being a mother, in many ways, is just how I imagined it would be. It’s fun, challenging, exhausting, full of love and snuggles. But I don’t think I ever could have imagined how strongly each of those feelings and emotions would impact me. It’s more fun, more challenging, more exhausting than I ever could have anticipated.

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My son is coming up on turning 11 months old this week. As I have gotten to know him over those months, I have learned a lot, both about myself and about parenthood in general. I have found that I can’t take my eyes off of him for more than a few seconds or he will make a break for the stairs. I have learned that no matter how good of a job I think I do at keeping stuff out of his reach, he will always find the one thing he shouldn’t be playing with. I have learned that my son’s laugh is the most incredible sound in the world. I have realized where I’m willing to take risks and where I am not. When previously I would have stepped on the gas to catch a yellow light, I now slow down and wait. Making that light may be worth the risk to my life, but it’s not worth the risk to his. It’s interesting to realize how differently you value and treat your own life as compared to your child’s.

Having a child certainly makes you look at the world differently. It’s as if everything you see is now filtered through a different lens. You think about what’s best for them, and how you can help them learn and grow. It also makes you think more often about the truly important things in life.

This past week, my son and I both came down with a cold. Nothing major, but just enough to where you feel pretty awful and you just want to sleep for a while. Well, as you parents know, kids don’t believe in taking a day to rest. I started feeling poorly after he was doing a lot better, so all he wanted to do was play and explore, while all I wanted to do was to take a nap. As he was staring at me, and starting to cry because I didn’t want to play, I thought about what it would be like if I was feeling run like this down all of the time. Those few days were difficult, but they were nothing compared to what so many individuals with IBD live through each and every day. It’s what I lived through every day for a very long time. It broke my heart to think of what it would be like if I had never had my surgery.

My son makes me thankful for my ostomy every day. It has allowed me to chase him around on the floor without feeling too exhausted. I can now break away for a quick moment to empty my bag, rather than spending a long time in the bathroom. I have the strength to pick him up and carry him around with me during the day.

On my first Mother’s day after his birth, I stop to think about what it means to be a mother. It’s about teaching your child how to navigate this world and to be a good and kind person. You show them how to love and be respectful of others. You give them the tools to make something of themselves and to chase after their dreams. But more than almost anything, it’s about being there for your child. And I am so thankful that my ostomy has allowed me to be there for mine.

Adventures in mommyhood (with an ostomy)

I have a hard time believing, at the moment, that my tiny little baby is going to be one-year old in just two months. Everyone always told me how quickly times goes by, but I am still shocked at how quickly it does. This week, we were blessed with the arrival of my first nephew, and when we went to meet him at the hospital, I was taken aback by how tiny he was and how I could hardly imagine my son being that size just 10 months ago.

These months have been a growing time for me, as well, as I learn what it means to be a mom. And while I know I having an ostomy has no bearing on the kind of mom I am, I do see some areas that are a little different for me. So I thought I’d start a new series. An OstoMOMmy series, if you will.

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I will plan to talk about any instances I find in my life as a mom that have been impacted by my ostomy and consider ways to deal with it or things I have learned from it. And I’d like your help, as well. In a series like this, I want to make sure I am writing about things that actually impact other people’s lives. So I’d like to know about your questions or ideas for topics.

What questions do you have about being a parent with an ostomy? Are there certain activities that concern you about raising a child or that you’ve already experienced? Are there things that you think will be different as a parent with an ostomy? Are there certain scenarios where you, as a parent, have had a different perspective because of your ostomy? What other parenting topics would you be interested in hearing more about?

I have a couple of topics in mind, but I figure this will be a series that I will write about as it happens, whether it happens often or only sporadically. Please comment below or on my Facebook page with your questions or topic ideas!