Tag Archives: life

May oh my!

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It’s a new day and a new month. Looking back, I’m glad with the way April went. I signed up for my first graduate class, I pulled off a couple of successful fundraisers and stepped up my training for the half-marathon, and I helped put on a great walk to benefit the CCFA.

It’s going to be another busy month, but I’m looking forward to fewer commitments than I had last month. My main goal right now is to get prepared for my half-marathon. I’m focusing on my training and making up the ground I’ve lost. I was going over my training from this season and realized that the end of March hit me hard. About half-way through the month, I was doing great and on target to increase my speed for this half. But that’s when the pain kicked in and the last two weeks of March I hardly did any working out at all. I picked up where I left off in April, but was about three weeks behind at that point. But I’m excited that I reached my goal of running 7 miles in April! Now I’m hoping to find a good pace for myself to get back to where I need to be.

And while I didn’t drink 100 ounces of water EVERY day, I’ve actually done pretty well with getting myself into a routine of drinking at least that much. And on the days that I didn’t make that goal, I still usually drank about 75 or more ounces. I’m planning on continuing to get into the habit of drinking more water every day.

I have some other things that I am going to be preparing for this month, as well… but more on that later.

  • Team Challenge goals
    • Prepare myself to run/walk 13.1 miles in just one month.
    • Secure final donations/sponsorships for Team Challenge fund.
    • Join the group in Charlotte for send-off party and BBQ fundraiser.
  • Grad School goals
    • Apply for some other scholarships.
    • Start brushing up on some communications theories.
  • Personal goals
    • Celebrate 1 year of living a better life with my ostomy!
    • Continue to drink at least 100 ounces of water EVERY day.
    • Host a big Mother’s Day brunch for Hughes, Lindsey and Frye families.
    • Finish house refinancing process. (We had planned to close in April, but are pushing it back to later this month, but should already be set to do that.)
    • Read Emma for Jane Austen book club and host this month’s meeting!

365 days and 156 posts later

stolen colon one year anniversary word cloud stephanie hughes crohns ostomy blogWow. Today marks exactly one year from the day I started The Stolen Colon. I started off with my first post The blog I didn’t want to write as an introduction and followed that with an update on my appointment with my doctor to schedule my surgery in The countdown begins.

What a difference a year makes. I was so scared at that time. I was just two weeks away from major, life-changing surgery and I had no idea what that would mean.

It has been quite a journey these past 12 months. I am proud of what The Stolen Colon has become, both for myself and for those who have become a part of my life because of it. But I’m looking forward even more to what the future holds. This is only the beginning. It has been an amazing experience being a part of this online community. I love the people I have met and the opportunities I have been given, and I’m looking forward to even more in the future.

Thank you all for your support over this past year. You all have meant so much to me and I wouldn’t be here without you… on this blog or in my day-to-day life, either. I look forward to continuing this conversation on Crohn’s disease and ostomies and being a part of the movement to remove the stigmas associated with these conditions and one day finding a cure.

These three remain

1 corinthians 13 faith hope love bible verse stephanie hughes stolen colon ostomy crohns blog

I have been pretty overwhelmed with negative feelings recently. You can probably see it in my writing and in the lack of attention to what has been going on in my little Stolen Colon world. I hit some bumps in the road lately that have made me feel down. Basically, I’ve felt like a failure.

It has made me think a lot about what is most important to me in this life. I start making a list of all of the things that I care about and all of the things that I want to be apart of or want to accomplish. But when I start taking a hard look at that list, I realize how little of it actually matters.

I have tried to take a step back and look at it with new eyes. As I’ve done that, I’ve realized that there are only 3 things in this world that really matter: my faith, my family and friends, my health. Outside of that, it’s all really just details. At the end of the day and at the end of this life, those are going to be the things that make a difference.

While I don’t believe this is exactly what Paul was talking about when he wrote 1 Corinthians 13, I do believe that the words of the Bible were meant to be a living entity that mean different things to different people at different times. Today, this is what it means to me:

FAITH
This represents my faith in God. My belief in what He did for us and what He offers us today. Making my faith a priority means spending time on it and enjoying learning more and listening to that still, small voice.

HOPE
Anything I can hope for the future rests on my health. If I don’t have the strength or energy that comes with being healthy, I know I won’t become the person I want to be. I have to focus on taking care of myself by eating right, staying hydrated, getting enough rest and not stressing about insignificant things.

LOVE
My relationship with my husband has got to be one of the most important things in my life on a daily basis. I think it’s easy to take this for granted and just live each day together. But I want to continue to grow together and learn about each other even more.
Keeping a good relationship with the rest of my family and friends is just as important. These people are always going to be a part of my life and are going to be the ones there for you when you need them, so I want to make sure to maintain those relationships and not let months go by without spending time together.

It’s amazing to think about how little I focus on those things. I don’t read my Bible or pray as much as I ought. I don’t spend purposeful time with Jarrod every day or my other family and friends like I want. I’ve been more focused on my health recently, but I also don’t put a huge emphasis on all of those aspects. 

If we base our worth on all of the others things that happen in our lives, we’re probably always going to feel like a failure. I keep thinking that once I do this or accomplish that, then I’ll be where I want to be and I’ll be able to kick this feeling. But that’s not going to cut it. Those things aren’t going to fulfill the things that I need in my life. What’s going to bring about the change I need is to remember what my priorities are (or should be) and to go after them.

I apologize if I’ve sounded like a broken record here over the past weeks/months, but sometimes the best way to make it through a tough time is to to lay it all out there for the world to see and work through it piece by piece.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt

This is no fable

Often when you tell someone that you’re planning on running more than 13 miles, all at one time and within a few hour timeframe (after they’ve give you the “you’re crazy” look), they’ll say something like, “Wow, I could never do that. I can hardly make it a mile without running out of breath.“ Well, not too long ago, that we me. I had zero endurance and a pathetic amount of strength. But little-by-little, I increased my workouts from hardly being able to WALK a 5K to completing a half-marathon in right about 2 ½ hours.

As I’ve only done two races in my life, I do not pretend to be an expert by any means, but in my time spent as an endurance athlete, there’s one thing that sticks out to me as making the biggest difference in my training: PACING. To me, this applies both to your actual speed and also to your breathing. Once I got that down, I quickly went from only being able to make it .25 of a mile before having to slow down and walk to running 2 miles, and I went from not being able to swim 250 yards continuously to over 1000 yards without stopping.

And all I did was learn to regulate my breathing and find that right rhythm that worked for me. Once I found it, it felt like I could go on forever at that pace. And that’s basically what I did for the Vegas race.

It’s like the old Aesop Fable of the Tortoise and the Hare. Slow and steady wins the race. (And “slow” is a relative term here. By it I mean not going at your top speed for those first few miles, because you’ll never make it the rest of the race. However, I realize that some people’s “slow” is actually pretty darn fast.)

I am not good at pacing myself in my day-to-day life. I want to sprint to the end and leave that tortoise in the dust. And I’m not like the rabbit who just wants to show off… actually, scratch that, I AM like the rabbit and I AM trying to show off. However, it’s not trying to be arrogant, it’s more of showing off for myself and proving that I can do it all, despite the fact that Crohn’s has tried to slow me down and despite the fact that I no longer have a colon. I want to show that it’s not going to hold me back. I think I’ve always felt that way and sort of felt like I was compensating for something.

Tortoise hare turtle rabbit aesop fable race nap stephanie hughes stolen colon crohns ostomy blog

That’s me, passed out in the bushes.

So once again, I have taken up too much on my plate, and I’m feeling the effects of it. I’m so far behind… in EVERYTHING. I’m not being able to run like I want to; I haven’t raised the money I need to raise; I’m behind on the plans for the Walk that’s just in a couple of weeks. I told myself after last year’s debaucle of trying to train for a half-marathon, raise $3500 and study for and actually do well on my GRE that I would not over-book myself again. Well… here we are!

June 1. That’s the date after which I am going to have to calm down. No more commitments. No more projects. I apologize, but if you have something you need for me to do, I’m going to have to say “no.” At that point, I only have two months left until I start grad school and I have a good bit of brushing up that I need to be doing between now and then. I am going to try to enjoy the summer without worrying about meetings and events and everything else that I have gotten myself caught up in over the past months.

And it’s not that I don’t enjoy what I’m doing. It’s just too much right now. I need to give myself a chance to catch my breath and find my rhythm.  Otherwise, I’m never going to finish this race.

Full speed ahead!

Wow, April has already started off with a bang! And it’s about time. After a rough March, I am glad to start new in April and get some stuff done!

springI had the day off yesterday and I used it well. I filed our taxes (a little late this year, but oh well), got paperwork together for refinancing house and cleaned, and I mean really cleaned, the house. I also put some requests in place for the Take Steps walk this month and met with the committee in the evening. Sadly, I didn’t really get the enjoy the beautiful day outside.

It’s good that I am getting organized early, because I have a big month ahead. Next week I am meeting with the director of the Communication department at NCSU to discuss the upcoming semester and to go ahead and schedule my courses. I am looking forward to getting some advice on what classes to start with and how many I should take. Also, I did successfully start applying for scholarships and also feel confident on the budget I have set up to pay for my degree without putting us in debt!

I have mentioned before that I am part of the planning committee for this year’s CCFA Take Steps Walk. That event is coming up at the end of the month and there’s still a lot of work to do! We are still getting the work out there and signing up sponsors and participants and getting all of the day-of logistics taken care of. There’s a lot that goes into this type of event and it is definitely a commitment  but I’ve really been enjoying the planning process and working with a bunch of really great people.

I also am going to kick up the Team Challenge work. We are now less than 2 months away and I am so far behind at this point. Trying to raise money more creatively is difficult, I am discovering. It doesn’t take a whole lot of time to put something together to ask your family and friends. But when you’re trying to get an outside sponsorship, a lot has to be done: you have to put together specific information for each group/business, you have to reach out to find a time to meet with them and you have to actually go meet with them and work with them through the process. I, honestly, just haven’t had the time to devote to it that I would have liked. Especially with the past month being so difficult, I’m feeling the pressure now. I mentioned last week that we’re working on an event, so hopefully I will have the details soon. It will likely be held towards the end of the month. Also, the Belk Charity Day sale is at the end of the month, so I have to step up the ticket sales on that, as well.

And all of that is not even getting into how behind I am on my training. Every morning, I wake up so sore that it just seems impossible to go for a run. And as you can see, it’s been so busy lately that I haven’t had the time to do so after work. I have to get on track and get on it NOW if I have any hope of being ready in time for my June 1 race.

The muscle pain has been feeling better, but not great, by any means. Especially when I wake up in the morning, I am still dealing with a lot of soreness and cramping. Due to that, and just for my health in general, I am trying my best to hydrate the way I need to be. I made a goal to drink 7 bottles or 112 ounces today. I have made it to 80 ounces already, so I think I’m going to make it today. But I have to find a way to keep that up every day. I’m good at a couple of days of week, but doing it every single day gets very difficult. (I challenge all of you to try to drink 100 ounces of water 7 days a week and I bet you’ll quickly find out it’s not as easy as it sounds.) When I’m committed to that, I feel like I spend my entire day dealing with it. I am having to drink at least a glass every hour, so I’m constantly looking at my clock and figuring out how much more I need to drink. And then there’s the fact that you have to continually fill up the water bottle AND you have to go to the bathroom every 10 minutes.

Now is the time to get organized and stay organized. I am off to a good start, but I need to keep the momentum going.

  • Team Challenge goals
    • Get at least a 7 mile run in by end of the month. (I realize that sounds really pathetic at this point in the game, but I think assuming anything more would be too much pressure on me.)
    • Plan and execute successful group fundraiser with other participants.
    • Secure other donations/sponsorships for Team Challenge fund.
    • Sell tickets for Belk Charity Day Sale.
  • Grad School goals
    • Meet with director and schedule courses.
    • Apply for some other scholarships.
  • Personal goals
    • Drink at least 100 ounces of water EVERY day.
    • Read Pride and Prejudiced for Jane Austen book club.
    • Finish house refinancing process.
    • Get all plans wrapped up and put into place for CCFA Walk.