Tag Archives: parenthood

There’s a new girl in town

Everything anyone ever told me about having two kids is true. The past few weeks since the birth of my daughter have been exhausting. They’ve been amazing, but exhausting, too. I have been wanting to share the news for a while, but had a difficult time finding the time (or energy) to sit down and actually do it. So I am woefully behind on this, but here goes…

chandler birth labor delivery mom baby ostomy blockage obstruction pregnancy ibd crohn's disease ileostomy stolen colon stephanie hughesOn July 11, we welcomed a wonderful new addition to our family: Chandler Marie. She was born at 38 weeks and 5 days gestation, nearly a full three weeks further along than my son. Her birth was the result of my body naturally going into labor, and not due to an induction because of a persistent bowel blockage, as I dealt with last time. (You can read the entire story of my first delivery here.)

The abbreviated version of this story is that I started having mild contractions the evening before around 10:00 p.m. I went to sleep and they woke me up a few hours later and we ventured over to the hospital around 3:00 a.m. to find that I was already 5 cm dilated. After 8 hours of labor, I was no further dilated, but then BAM, in the next hour and a half I went from 5 to 10 cm dilated. I started pushing at 1:01 p.m. and she officially entered the world at 1:07 p.m. (Trust me, it was not the same story with my first.) She weighed 7 lbs. 9 oz. at birth.

There were no complications with my ostomy during the actual labor and delivery process. It was essentially a non-factor during that time. And thankfully, as was the case with my first, my body seemed to get back to normal as soon as she was born. I was able to start eating the same foods I had prior to pregnancy with no blockage issues! It’s taken a few weeks, but my stoma is getting back to normal. It was still fairly large for the first couple of weeks and I was concerned that it might not return to its normal size, but at 9 weeks postpartum it seems to be pretty close to the size it was originally and not prolapsed like it had been during my pregnancy.

chandler birth labor delivery mom baby ostomy blockage obstruction pregnancy ibd crohn's disease ileostomy stolen colon stephanie hughesChandler has been doing great, as well. We were able to come home just 24 hours after her birth. She’s been growing like a champ and getting more personality by the day.

I’ll be sure to share a little more about the final weeks of my pregnancy with an ostomy and attempting to avoid another blockage but know I am so thankful that I was able to avoid any further complications with my ostomy and any more hospitalizations. I wanted so much to be able to deliver as a result of spontaneous labor and I was able to achieve that goal, but it definitely wasn’t easy.

These past few weeks have been a big adjustment as I’m now living with a high-energy 2-year-old and an infant. I hope as we get more settled that I can get back into a good routine of sharing information and keeping in contact with all of you. I apologize to anyone that I have not responded to recently and I hope to be in touch soon. Thank you for all of your support and well wishes!

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How to dress when pregnant with an ostomy

I have done a video before about what to wear with an ostomy, but now that I am almost 9-months pregnant, I wanted to talk about how to dress when your stomach becomes more of a focal point. It does become a bit more complicated to attempt to hide your ostomy bag during this time, but I don’t think that means you still can’t dress the way you want. I think it is much more about what you are comfortable with and making your decisions based on that. Here are some of the clothing options I have chosen throughout my pregnancy, but I’d love to know if you have found some other options that I do not cover here!

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5 years: The resentment anniversary?

It has been 5 years since I had my surgery to get an ostomy. It’s funny, I’ve been looking forward to this day because 5 years seems like such a good marker of time. And my ostomy has made such a profound impact on my life, that I felt like it would be a time to celebrate. Five years of not living with active Crohn’s disease; five years of being able to take part in the activities I want to; five years of not living in fear of finding the closest bathroom. But this has ended up being an interesting anniversary for me.

If you look back at my previous anniversary posts (One, Two, Three, Four), they are mostly filled with gratitude and hope. This year, I feel a bit more resentful and not wanting to celebrate my ostomy or what it has given me the past few years. I have not gotten into it yet on my blog, but I will soon tell you the full story of my second pregnancy and the complications that I have been having due to my ostomy. In a nutshell, I just returned home from spending a week in the hospital due to a pretty severe intestinal blockage. It’s actually pretty amazing that I did not end up requiring surgery in order to relieve it. Currently, I have a catheter inserted into my stoma to help ensure it does not collapse or get squashed between my uterus and my abdomen. It’s painful. It’s uncomfortable. I feel exhausted.

And now I am on a nearly entirely liquid diet, which is not only boring, but I’m hungry pretty much all of the time. Plus, I’m worried about getting enough calories during the day, not only to support myself, but to support my baby, too, who is not due for another 11 weeks. Top it off with a 2-year-old who I am home with much of the time and just don’t feel I have the energy to keep up with him, and it’s also difficult to move too much without hurting myself.

Suffice it to say I’ve been feeling pretty sorry for myself recently. I think I’ve been going through a mourning period of having to let go of the plans I had for this pregnancy and the hopes I held onto for a spontaneous birth close to my due date. I had wanted to spend these final weeks relishing the time I have with my son before he’s joined by a sibling and enjoying our life as a family of three. But none of that is going to happen the way that I had planned.

But you know, I’ve also realized that life usually does not go the way you planned. I am not the first woman to deal with complications during pregnancy or concerns about taking care of her other child. I also see how blessed I am that we’ve been able to handle the issue with this catheter, despite how uncomfortable it is. I am blessed to be home with my family, able to move around, and I’m not confined to bed rest at the hospital for weeks, as many women deal with during pregnancy. I am blessed to have amazing family and friends close by who have dropped everything to help us out and make sure that we have everything we need.

So instead of being resentful today, I am trying to focus on the many positives that I have going on in my life: I have a beautiful new baby on the way that I am so excited about and my ostomy played a huge part in me being able to do that, other than dealing with the blockage issues I am healthy, I am not confined to a hospital bed, I have amazing support to help me get through the coming weeks. And I know whenever this baby arrives and in whatever fashion that we will cherish the time we have together. When I think back to when my son was born, and the four weeks I had expected to continue being pregnant, I am thankful for that extra time we had together. And I’m glad to live in an area with some of the best doctors and hospitals who I know will take the best care possible of my little one, no matter what happens.

This anniversary is a little different from the ones previous, but it may end up being one of the most significant ones I experience. Life is not always going to go the way that you want, and it has a way of trashing many of the best laid plans, but that doesn’t mean that all is lost or that we should just give up. My ostomy has given me a great 5 years, and I look forward to what it will allow me to accomplish and experience in the future, despite the discomfort it may be causing me for the time being.

The second time around

And how I plan to better manage my pregnancy with an ostomy

Here we go again! We are excited to announce that we are expecting our second child this July! My husband and Waylon and I are so excited to grow our little family. (You can see W showing you where the baby is!)

new baby pregnancy stolen colon ostomy ileostomy colostomy urostomy ibd inflammatory bowel disease crohn's ulcerative colitis

It’s amazing the difference already between the first pregnancy and the second in as much attention you devote to it. With my first, it was pretty much all I thought about, all of the time. This time around, between chasing after a toddler, finishing up my master’s degree and just everything else I have to accomplish in a day, I feel that I’ve had very little time to really just think about it and what all it means. I, myself, am a second child and I suddenly have a whole new appreciation for what that means and my place in my family…

For those of you who followed along with my first pregnancy, you know that I had complications in the end—specifically an intestinal blockage—that led to a series of hospitalizations, a dreaded NG tube, and ultimately to my induction just before 36 weeks when I gave birth to my son. So obviously, we had some things to consider when we discussed the idea of having another child.

So how do I plan to make this pregnancy different from the first? Well, in all honesty, I’m not sure that I can, but I sure as hell am going to try. While I was being cautious with the foods I ate later in my first pregnancy, I realize now that I was not being cautious enough. There were a couple of times that I ate things that were probably a little too risky. Knowing now what the consequences of that can be, I will be sure to be more vigilant in making sure that I avoid problem foods and make smarter decisions. I have already noticed a time or two that I have felt a little blocked up, although nothing that some extra hydration and careful eating couldn’t fix, but it does make me wary about how the next few months are going to go.

I have bandied the idea of going on a mostly liquid diet during the final weeks, but the reality of living for 10+ weeks on a liquid diet when you’re pregnant would not be an easy task. At the minimum, I will be employing a some sort of low residue diet during that time, in hopes that I do not run into the same issues I experienced last time.

But other than some extra caution and some food avoidance, I can’t say that I have done anything differently this time than I did the first time. I have been trying my best to stay hydrated, but that’s a constant struggle, pregnancy or no pregnancy. I am prepared with some larger sized wafers for once my stoma grows, which I expect it will again, and potentially prolapses.

Even with the complications last time, I am still not considered high risk by my obstetrician. I do know they’ll be keeping a slightly closer eye on me, especially as I progress further along in the pregnancy, but the ostomy really doesn’t change any of my treatment, unless there is another complication.

For now, I am focused on trying to eat healthy, but smart from an ostomy stand-point, drink lots and lots of water, and hopefully enjoy a complication-free pregnancy.

(You can read some about my previous pregnancy, as well: All about pregnancy with an ostomy.)