Bowel obstruction during pregnancy, earlier than expected

Just a few days shy of being 28 weeks pregnant I got a bowel obstruction. Intestinal blockages are something I dealt with during my first pregnancy which resulting in my son being born at almost 36 weeks. (You can read more about my experience with blockages and my son’s birth story.) This time, the issue came up a full month before it had my previous pregnancy, which really threw me off. I had prepared for the possibility of a blockage and had determined to switch up my diet at 30 weeks, in hopes of preventing one from occurring, but obviously this one did not wait that long.

I woke up in the morning feeling horrible and I called my mom to pick up my son because I knew I would not be able to take care of him. I was hopeful that with some bowel rest, physical rest and hydrating that things might start to clear up. I was actually a little unsure as to whether or not it was a bowel obstruction because of where the pain was. With my first pregnancy, the obstruction was just a few inches from my stoma, so the pain was concentrated in the lower right portion of my stomach. This time, it was across the top of my stomach. I ended up spending the entire day in bed, but things only felt worse as the day went on. I was in pain, throwing up, and could hardly stand up. I actually ended up calling an ambulance to take me to the hospital, which was the first time I’d had to do that since my surgery. I had hoped that by traveling in an ambulance that I would get checked right into the ER, but that was not the case and it ended up being a much bigger deal because they did not want to transfer me to the Women’s Hospital at this point, which is where I went with any issues during my first pregnancy. But I won’t bore you with all of the details of finally getting admitted to the right place for both me and the baby.

Once I did admitted to the Women’s Hospital, the first order of business was getting fluids and a fabulous NG tube. (I’ve written about getting an NG tube previously, so I’ll refer you back there for more on that experience, because this one was pretty much the same.) There were lots of tests those first few days, which included a couple of X-rays and a CT scan. As a pregnant woman, this is a difficult decision to make on how to handle the need for radiation, as it can be harmful to the baby. Thankfully, I was already in the 3^rd trimester at this point, which means the baby’s internal organs are formed and the radiation poses much less of a risk. I still did not like having to go through that, but I also know that I have to be healthy in order to provide what my baby needs. The CT scan showed just how blocked up I was. The doctor showed me the pictures and my entire small intestine looked like fat sausages (that’s the best way I can think of to describe it). I have no idea what a healthy intestine looks like on a CT scan, but even I could see that this was not what it was supposed to look like. And that explained why I was having pain across the top of my stomach, because that’s how far the blockage extended.

I do not remember a whole lot from the first days, but I know by my fourth day there they tried inserting a catheter into my stoma, which is what they ended up doing with my previous pregnancy. This helped incredibly and I finally started getting some output from my stoma and some relief from the pain. The next day they were able to remove the NG tube and I started being able to consume some liquids and eventually some very bland hospital food. Thankfully, things continued to improve over the next couple of days, and even though I was still in a lot of pain, I was able to function.

Of course during this whole time they were monitoring my baby closely, but thankfully there were no complications in that capacity. I was dealing with some mild contractions while I was there, which is likely due, at least in part, to dehydration and just to the stress of the situation. It was not anything that turned into an actual issue. Honestly, the baby seemed very unfazed by the whole ordeal.

I ended up spending 7 days in the hospital with this blockage. It is actually pretty amazing that I was able to avoid surgery considering how blocked up my small intestine was. I am so thankful that it was able to pass due to the NG tube and the catheter without having to go through a surgical procedure, especially at 7 months pregnant. Probably the most difficult part was being without my son for that time. I stay home with during the week, so it’s usually just me and him, and it felt horrible not being able to be there for him during this time. He finally was able to come visit me once I started feeling better. I’m grateful to my amazing family who stepped up and made sure he was taken care of during this time. In the end, I left with a new low fiber diet plan and a catheter sutured to my stomach, but more on that later.

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Finding love with an ostomy

Every so often I will hear a conversation about romantic relationships while living with an ostomy. Often someone will say they were left because of their ostomy, or that they’ve resigned themselves to being alone because no one could love them now. And I have one thing to say to them: STOP IT. An ostomy does not make you unlovable. It doesn’t make you anything other than another human with your own set of experiences. That ostomy is simply a symbol of the life you have lived and who you have become through those experiences.

Now full disclosure before I get too far into this: I was married when I went through surgery to get my ostomy, so I have not gone through the dating process with one; however, I believe what I am writing is true no matter what point you are at in a relationship.

Sometimes, it’s not the ostomy.

When you go through something that necessitates getting an ostomy—whether it’s a chronic condition like IBD or some sort of trauma—that’s a lot for a person to handle. It may bring up feelings of “why me?” or resentment towards God or the world. Constant pain can make anyone feel frustrated. Having difficulty after surgery can lead to depression, feeling sorry for yourself, and lashing out at others. All of these can cause issues in a relationship. If you were someone whose partner left after your surgery, I am not at all saying that you are at fault. What I am saying is that going through this can change people, and when people change, the relationship changes and sometimes that relationship no longer works. So, if you were someone who was left and you felt they left because you now have an ostomy, there may be a lot more at play than simply that. Continue reading →

Why I freak out when I see one of these

Mouth ulcers. Or canker sores, whichever you call them.

One way I could always tell when my inflammatory bowel disease was active was when I started getting mouth ulcers. I remember when I was younger and going through a rough patch of symptoms and I would have 20 or more ulcers in my mouth. It made it difficult to eat or even to swallow.

Even now, when my IBD is not causing symptoms, whenever one or more these pops up, I get concerned. This one in the picture is actually from biting my lip, but it’s taking a very long time to heal and that also worries me. I also have another on my tongue, that I can’t get a picture of, that has come and gone a time or two over the past couple of months. Also, about two weeks ago I had one of the roof of my mouth.

I know it doesn’t sound like much, but it’s enough to make me think twice about how I’ve been feeling and to get me to pay a little more attention to my health. That’s the thing about living with chronic illness: You’re never out of the woods. It’s never gone, you’re never cured. Sometimes it feels like you’re just waiting around for it to pop back up again.

I am very thankful to have had these years since my surgery without dealing with any major symptoms of inflammatory bowel disease, but there is always this little part of me, in the back of my mind, that worries about those symptoms coming back. It was a big concern during my pregnancy, since your body goes through so much change during that time, it can kick up a reoccurrence of symptoms. Again, I’m thankful to have made it through my pregnancy without that happening.

We live in this constant state of uncertainty, and it’s difficult to get used to that. Seriously, how do you even begin to deal with that?? I honestly don’t know. I guess you just eventually get used to that uncertainty and start to mistake it for normalcy. Regardless, this is why I try to live my life in the moment. I will readily admit that I am not always successful at that. I am a major planner and like to know what I’m getting into, but I’m trying to be present in each day. Today’s a good day, so I will enjoy it and try to live it for all that it’s worth. And if tomorrow is not a good day… I guess we’ll deal with that tomorrow.

2015 at The Stolen Colon

I’m always amazed at the end of each year as I look back and realize all that happened in the past 365 days. Obviously 2015 held even bigger changes than previous years as I announced my pregnancy at the beginning of the year and gave birth (amid some ostomy drama) to my son. And if that wasn’t enough, in my personal life, we settled into our new home that we moved into just before the beginning of the year, I decided to leave my full-time job in favor of working from home and getting to spend time with my kid, and celebrated 5 years of marriage to my husband.

I thought I’d take this chance to highlight some of my favorite posts from the past year. I actually had a hard time narrowing this down because there were a lot of posts that really meant a lot to me this year. It’s pretty pregnancy / baby dominated, but I’m OK with that!

Continue reading →

When your body fails you

I wanted to share something I wrote just 3 days before my son was born. This was after 3 hospitalizations for an intestinal blockage (which you can read more about here) and just 1 day before I admitted myself to the hospital for a fourth time and eventually would have labor induced. It was definitely not what I had planned and it took some time for me to come to terms with the idea of letting go of the labor and birth I had desired.

There comes a point with this disease that you start to feel like your body has failed you. For me, that point was a long time ago. Longer than I can remember. And I am very thankful that I haven’t felt that way in a long time now. But by the time I admitted myself to the hospital for the third time in as many weeks, all of those feelings started flooding over me again. And this time they were even worse because I didn’t feel like I was just failing myself, but failing my child, as well. My child hadn’t even been born yet and already I couldn’t take care of him. I couldn’t get him everything he needed.

And when the doctors started talking about having to take him early, because my body wasn’t doing what it was supposed to do, it scared me. I had promised myself from the beginning of this pregnancy that I would not be one of those people wishing the baby out earlier than he was ready. Because I know that they stay in there for a reason and that when he was ready, he’d come. I didn’t want to wish any negative side effects on him simply because I was uncomfortable.

But I was also dealing with the fact that keeping him in could be just as dangerous. I had to stay healthy in order to keep him healthy. When things started going downhill for me, I had to take medications, stay away from some of the healthy, but hard-to-digest food I was eating, and spend long hours in the hospital, all of which could cause him harm. Still, the last thing I wanted was for him to enter the world surrounded by cold machines and being hooked up to tubes and wires. I have spent enough of my life there that I hope he never has to know that. I wanted the first things he knew to be me and his dad and how much we love him. I wanted it to be warmth and excitement, not being whisked away to a NICU.

These are feelings I don’t know how to move past. It’s a hard place to be when you feel like you can’t trust your own body. All I can do is pray and trust that God will see me through and will take care of my little one, whenever and however he arrives.

I cried the entire time I wrote these words, feeling so uncertain and scared. I am so thankful that God did see me through and He did take care of my little one who was born at a healthy weight, did not have to be hooked up to any tubes or wires and spent no time in the NICU. He came out to that warmth and excitement I had hoped for him. You can read the full story here.

So while things did not go exactly as I had planned, in the end we had a healthy little boy. And during the induction, my body stepped up and allowed for a smooth delivery. It’s like it knew it was time for him to be born. I guess it wasn’t as much of a failure as I had thought.