There’s a new girl in town

Everything anyone ever told me about having two kids is true. The past few weeks since the birth of my daughter have been exhausting. They’ve been amazing, but exhausting, too. I have been wanting to share the news for a while, but had a difficult time finding the time (or energy) to sit down and actually do it. So I am woefully behind on this, but here goes…

On July 11, we welcomed a wonderful new addition to our family: Chandler Marie. She was born at 38 weeks and 5 days gestation, nearly a full three weeks further along than my son. Her birth was the result of my body naturally going into labor, and not due to an induction because of a persistent bowel blockage, as I dealt with last time. (You can read the entire story of my first delivery here.)

The abbreviated version of this story is that I started having mild contractions the evening before around 10:00 p.m. I went to sleep and they woke me up a few hours later and we ventured over to the hospital around 3:00 a.m. to find that I was already 5 cm dilated. After 8 hours of labor, I was no further dilated, but then BAM, in the next hour and a half I went from 5 to 10 cm dilated. I started pushing at 1:01 p.m. and she officially entered the world at 1:07 p.m. (Trust me, it was not the same story with my first.) She weighed 7 lbs. 9 oz. at birth.

There were no complications with my ostomy during the actual labor and delivery process. It was essentially a non-factor during that time. And thankfully, as was the case with my first, my body seemed to get back to normal as soon as she was born. I was able to start eating the same foods I had prior to pregnancy with no blockage issues! It’s taken a few weeks, but my stoma is getting back to normal. It was still fairly large for the first couple of weeks and I was concerned that it might not return to its normal size, but at 9 weeks postpartum it seems to be pretty close to the size it was originally and not prolapsed like it had been during my pregnancy.

Chandler has been doing great, as well. We were able to come home just 24 hours after her birth. She’s been growing like a champ and getting more personality by the day.

I’ll be sure to share a little more about the final weeks of my pregnancy with an ostomy and attempting to avoid another blockage but know I am so thankful that I was able to avoid any further complications with my ostomy and any more hospitalizations. I wanted so much to be able to deliver as a result of spontaneous labor and I was able to achieve that goal, but it definitely wasn’t easy.

These past few weeks have been a big adjustment as I’m now living with a high-energy 2-year-old and an infant. I hope as we get more settled that I can get back into a good routine of sharing information and keeping in contact with all of you. I apologize to anyone that I have not responded to recently and I hope to be in touch soon. Thank you for all of your support and well wishes!

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5 years: The resentment anniversary?

It has been 5 years since I had my surgery to get an ostomy. It’s funny, I’ve been looking forward to this day because 5 years seems like such a good marker of time. And my ostomy has made such a profound impact on my life, that I felt like it would be a time to celebrate. Five years of not living with active Crohn’s disease; five years of being able to take part in the activities I want to; five years of not living in fear of finding the closest bathroom. But this has ended up being an interesting anniversary for me.

If you look back at my previous anniversary posts (One, Two, Three, Four), they are mostly filled with gratitude and hope. This year, I feel a bit more resentful and not wanting to celebrate my ostomy or what it has given me the past few years. I have not gotten into it yet on my blog, but I will soon tell you the full story of my second pregnancy and the complications that I have been having due to my ostomy. In a nutshell, I just returned home from spending a week in the hospital due to a pretty severe intestinal blockage. It’s actually pretty amazing that I did not end up requiring surgery in order to relieve it. Currently, I have a catheter inserted into my stoma to help ensure it does not collapse or get squashed between my uterus and my abdomen. It’s painful. It’s uncomfortable. I feel exhausted.

And now I am on a nearly entirely liquid diet, which is not only boring, but I’m hungry pretty much all of the time. Plus, I’m worried about getting enough calories during the day, not only to support myself, but to support my baby, too, who is not due for another 11 weeks. Top it off with a 2-year-old who I am home with much of the time and just don’t feel I have the energy to keep up with him, and it’s also difficult to move too much without hurting myself.

Suffice it to say I’ve been feeling pretty sorry for myself recently. I think I’ve been going through a mourning period of having to let go of the plans I had for this pregnancy and the hopes I held onto for a spontaneous birth close to my due date. I had wanted to spend these final weeks relishing the time I have with my son before he’s joined by a sibling and enjoying our life as a family of three. But none of that is going to happen the way that I had planned.

But you know, I’ve also realized that life usually does not go the way you planned. I am not the first woman to deal with complications during pregnancy or concerns about taking care of her other child. I also see how blessed I am that we’ve been able to handle the issue with this catheter, despite how uncomfortable it is. I am blessed to be home with my family, able to move around, and I’m not confined to bed rest at the hospital for weeks, as many women deal with during pregnancy. I am blessed to have amazing family and friends close by who have dropped everything to help us out and make sure that we have everything we need.

So instead of being resentful today, I am trying to focus on the many positives that I have going on in my life: I have a beautiful new baby on the way that I am so excited about and my ostomy played a huge part in me being able to do that, other than dealing with the blockage issues I am healthy, I am not confined to a hospital bed, I have amazing support to help me get through the coming weeks. And I know whenever this baby arrives and in whatever fashion that we will cherish the time we have together. When I think back to when my son was born, and the four weeks I had expected to continue being pregnant, I am thankful for that extra time we had together. And I’m glad to live in an area with some of the best doctors and hospitals who I know will take the best care possible of my little one, no matter what happens.

This anniversary is a little different from the ones previous, but it may end up being one of the most significant ones I experience. Life is not always going to go the way that you want, and it has a way of trashing many of the best laid plans, but that doesn’t mean that all is lost or that we should just give up. My ostomy has given me a great 5 years, and I look forward to what it will allow me to accomplish and experience in the future, despite the discomfort it may be causing me for the time being.

The second time around

And how I plan to better manage my pregnancy with an ostomy

Here we go again! We are excited to announce that we are expecting our second child this July! My husband and Waylon and I are so excited to grow our little family. (You can see W showing you where the baby is!)

It’s amazing the difference already between the first pregnancy and the second in as much attention you devote to it. With my first, it was pretty much all I thought about, all of the time. This time around, between chasing after a toddler, finishing up my master’s degree and just everything else I have to accomplish in a day, I feel that I’ve had very little time to really just think about it and what all it means. I, myself, am a second child and I suddenly have a whole new appreciation for what that means and my place in my family…

For those of you who followed along with my first pregnancy, you know that I had complications in the end—specifically an intestinal blockage—that led to a series of hospitalizations, a dreaded NG tube, and ultimately to my induction just before 36 weeks when I gave birth to my son. So obviously, we had some things to consider when we discussed the idea of having another child.

So how do I plan to make this pregnancy different from the first? Well, in all honesty, I’m not sure that I can, but I sure as hell am going to try. While I was being cautious with the foods I ate later in my first pregnancy, I realize now that I was not being cautious enough. There were a couple of times that I ate things that were probably a little too risky. Knowing now what the consequences of that can be, I will be sure to be more vigilant in making sure that I avoid problem foods and make smarter decisions. I have already noticed a time or two that I have felt a little blocked up, although nothing that some extra hydration and careful eating couldn’t fix, but it does make me wary about how the next few months are going to go.

I have bandied the idea of going on a mostly liquid diet during the final weeks, but the reality of living for 10+ weeks on a liquid diet when you’re pregnant would not be an easy task. At the minimum, I will be employing a some sort of low residue diet during that time, in hopes that I do not run into the same issues I experienced last time.

But other than some extra caution and some food avoidance, I can’t say that I have done anything differently this time than I did the first time. I have been trying my best to stay hydrated, but that’s a constant struggle, pregnancy or no pregnancy. I am prepared with some larger sized wafers for once my stoma grows, which I expect it will again, and potentially prolapses.

Even with the complications last time, I am still not considered high risk by my obstetrician. I do know they’ll be keeping a slightly closer eye on me, especially as I progress further along in the pregnancy, but the ostomy really doesn’t change any of my treatment, unless there is another complication.

For now, I am focused on trying to eat healthy, but smart from an ostomy stand-point, drink lots and lots of water, and hopefully enjoy a complication-free pregnancy.

(You can read some about my previous pregnancy, as well: All about pregnancy with an ostomy.)

Dealing with intestinal obstructions

I am never not surprised by how debilitating an obstruction is. It’s so much more than an obstructed feeling in your stomach. For me, it makes my entire body ache. It makes me feel run down. More often than not, my first sign of an obstruction is simply feeling bleh. (Yes, I believe that’s the technical term.) Even before noticing a lack of output or stomach pains.

This morning, I woke up not feeling great. Sort of nauseated and tired. It wasn’t until after breakfast (which I didn’t eat) that I noticed my bag filling up with liquid. That’s when I realized why I had been feeling run down, even last night. Now it’s the afternoon and I haven’t eaten anything all day, but I have emptied several bags of liquid output, and everything hurts and I really wish I could curl up in a ball and stay there, praying that it passes. However, I have a 15-month-old, so that’s probably not going to happen.

I have written about blockages a couple of times in the past (See: My first major blockage – which still makes me laugh that I considered it a “major” blockage. After having a major blockage later on, trust me, it wasn’t. And see: Intestinal blockages during pregnancy), but since they are an ongoing concern, I wanted to address them again.

So how do you deal with an intestinal blockage or obstruction?

The first step is doing what you can to avoid them. You do this by hydrating (which I have not been doing well) and by watching what you eat (which also could have used some work this week).

But once you have a blockage of some sort, the next step is to get back to hydrating. Whether you’ve been staying hydrated or not prior to the obstruction, do it after a blockage starts. A blockage can be caused by dehydration and it also causes dehydration by pushing out only liquid output. Hydration can be helpful in getting the blockage to start moving again, as well as simply helping you stay healthy outside of that.

Next, be cautious what you eat. If you’re anything like me, you likely don’t want to eat anything anyways, but if you are hungry, I suggest sticking with non-solids, such as smoothies, yogurt, applesauce, etc. This way you can continue to take in nutrients, but these foods shouldn’t add to the blockage that has formed.

From here, there are a few things you can try… Massage your stomach. This can help get things moving, possibly even break up a smaller obstruction. Use a heating pad. Of course be careful of putting heat on your skin, but the warmth does help your muscles to relax which can get food moving again. Take a warm bath. Another way of trying to relax your muscles. You can also simply wait for it to pass, which it will sometimes.

A lot of blockages can be taken care of at home in these ways, but do be willing to go to the doctor or hospital if things get worse. Severe blockages can lead to more complications, so if you feel that the blockage is not going to pass easily, the hospital is your next option. Only you know your body, so pay attention to the signs it gives you. If you start vomiting or are dealing with extreme pain, it’s time to get medical help. The hospital will make sure you are staying hydrated and getting the nutrients you need, even if you are unable to eat anything. They may opt for using an NG tube, which is not pleasant at all, but it really does work. If a blockage gets too severe, they may consider surgery, but that’s a last option.

Once a blockage passes, you may still deal with some lingering issues. I like to call it an “obstruction hangover,” because the next day I usually still don’t feel quite right, even if I am feeling a lot better than before. I try to take it easy, drink lots of water and stick with either liquids or easily digestible foods. And usually after that, I feel back to normal.

I hope you never have to deal with an intestinal blockage, but if you do, these are some of the things I have found along the way that have helped me get through them. For those who have been through an obstruction, what has your experience been? Do you have other tips that might help somebody get through a blockage?

A new meaning for World IBD Day

May 19 may be World IBD day, but that is no longer the significance that this day holds for me. It was this day in 2015 that I was first admitted to the hospital with an intestinal blockage during the third trimester of my pregnancy. It was the beginning of the end of my pregnancy.

Two days before, I had sent out a tweet about feeling a little blocked up. Honestly, at the time I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. It felt like the number of other times I had a mild blockage that would clear on its own if I drank a lot of water and stayed away from fibrous foods. Even when I went to the ER that day, I really only went because I was pregnant. If I hadn’t been worried about my son, I seriously doubt I would have gone to the hospital. It was more about being extra cautious than actually thinking there was a problem. After about a day in the hospital, I already was feeling better. I remember my surgeon coming in to talk to me and telling him I felt great and didn’t see a reason I needed to stay any longer.

Little did I know how much worse it would get over the coming days and weeks. Two days after being released from the hospital, I was in tears over the amount of pain I was in and would end up taking myself back to the hospital in the morning. And three weeks after that, my son would be here.

For me now, this day is a reminder of how much IBD can impact your life and the lives of the people around you. My pregnancy and my son’s birth did not go as I had planned. Thankfully, everything turned out well in the end, with a healthy baby and a healthy mom, but it could have gone another direction. I know if we decide to have more kids, I will go about things differently in the hopes of preventing another blockage.* But the truth is… with a disease like IBD, you never know what’s going to happen. And that’s why awareness is so important. So people have the information they need in order to make the best decisions. So others understand, even just a little bit, what it’s like to live with an unpredictable disease. And so one day a cure can save others from spending World IBD Day in the emergency room.

*This post was written before the birth of the second child and, as anticipated here, my experience was challenging and unpredictable. Although thankfully we ultimately had another healthy baby!